Roots of Grief
1. These Fevered Days
Lava spat back for miles
Soil for my impermeable tomb
Urged to stray from the aisle
To erase me from this womb
But afar, lo, its crawling might
Crowns ignite green by light
Roots harbor life nor sound
Sunlight had never troubled the ground
Jukai, the sea is deep
My reasons for the woods to keep
I dive in, troubled with doubt
My vow is not to be found
As night falls, a flight of all hope
No longer designed to survive
The egress, dead or alive
Is by means of the rope
Won't you drag
These fevered days
Unto the sea
And let them bleed
Under the trees
These severed ways
Will leave their trail
Not to be found
"Elysium is as far as to
The very nearest Room
If in that Room a Friend await
Felicity or Doom--
What fortitude the Soul contains
That it can so endure
The accent of a coming Foot--
The opening of a Door--
Doom is the House without the Door -
Tis entered from the Sun -
And then the Ladder's thrown away,
Because Escape - is done -"
Three times dawn-to-dark
The forest seeps in my skin
The drought left its mark
My life is wearing thin
I contrive peers on my way
The letter, the rope, the bones
Descried nothing which atones
I saw dim light but no new day
Filled with thirst and hunger
I sink into endless slumber
No knowledge of what lies ahead
My narrative is left behind
A life swayed by regret
Lines from a tortured mind
For none will come to mourn
A rose with only its thorn
2. As in Autumn
As in Autumn
From the trees
We are the leaves
Welcome to my sacred world
A mise-en-scène of the nameless
I wait for the curtain t fall
On the stage of the forgotten
A face, a name without meaning
Your smile without a feeling
I'm casting roles without a tale to tell
In a theatre one cannot escape (from)
Jesus Christ on the wall
And children hiding in the garden
As in Autumn
From the trees
The lens closed its eye upon me
I'm captured in black and white
Left with nothing to fight for
No more days - I want nothing more
In a world where nothing speaks
I find but the traces of my deeds
My wish falls on a deaf crowd
Even screams could not escape my mouth
Not the same Christ on the wall
No children hiding in the garden
This world infects me without impressions
Leaving me numb without expressions
A thousand words I take with me
The screams, the anger, the dark whispers
You'll never know what I hate
You'll never know whom I love
I am stil here, but I'm not alive
With no one to help
Why can't I tell you
Why can't you help me
Please, help me die....
3. La Marche Funèbre: L'avenue des cœurs passés
A somber view... of dying love
The air breathes pain and loss
I walk on dirty cobbles...
Shimmering of old tears
I walk on buried joy...
Drowned hopes and shattered dreams
Je me promène sur l'avenue des cœurs passés
Et j'y trouve des belles âmes blessées
Je me promène sur l'avenue des cœurs cassés
La chaussée des larmes et des cœurs brisés...
At my left I see a young woman
Struggling for happiness
Her child cries my name
Until my ears bleed and my heart dies
Another tragedy somewhere on the right
Mother of some of my prettiest dreams
Her heart in her hand - Her eyes look at me
Black from unstoppable sadness
Others appear... all beautiful creatures
Once dancing as fairies under the moon
As succubae in rapture... with me
But I left without love...
Their pain is mine
Their broken hearts
Their shattered dreams
In my dreams they haunt me
Angel claws tear my skin
Their grief is now mine
Leaving me... scarred and wrecked
I know I'll have to bury
These fragile dreams of love
So deep... so deep...
I wipe away my tears and walk on...
To my sad past's funeral...
4. La Marche Funèbre: Nothing to Declare
My eyes - died in salted sadness
My ears - drowned in floods of blood
My heart - buried with my past
My life - leaving me...
Nothing to declare - I left it all there
Nothing to declare - but infinite despair
And in this soundless darkness
Bereft of almost all senses
I wished and hoped for tranquility
Awake dreams of eternal rest
A myriad of distressing seeds
Planted by my self and soul
Awoke a restless inner ghoul
'Cause history can't be buried!
I see - the faces of those I lost
I hear - my name in desperate cries
I feel - pain in my crimson chambers
I know - I thought I had...
Nothing to declare
Sad memories haunt me
Grief written in every nerve and vein
The history of my dismal senses
Leaving me... no rest or escape!
This life-devouring desperation
Drags me to the ultimate edge
Embrace life (- Face death)
As only in life I might heal...
(Embrace life -) Face death
As only in death I can hide...
5. La Marche Funèbre: Roots of Grief
Feet stumbling, sweat running
I breathe dust and walk on
Until the end of the world
To this broken life's end
One way dead end road
I sense... darkness and death
I guess... this must be hell
And I know I have to go...
While my spine chills unendingly - I live!
My hands search for escape - I gotta get away!
Primordial instincts take control - I live!
A stronge force of life calles me - I gotta get away!
I grasp memories of blood and tears
Reason shut down as I ascend
I rise in trance as my life passes by
A kaleidoscope slightly fading to black...
6. La Marche Funèbre: Bleak
Beating pumping blood...
Bleak peeking light...
7. La Marche Funèbre: Crown of Hope
Slowly I realize... I am awake
Lying under the wings of a majestic tree
Mystified by this returning life
Is this heaven? It sure ain't hell
Wondering how I got here
Getting up along the tree
I hold its stem and freeze
As its voice speaks to me...
Please let me introduce myself
I am your personal tree... of pain
Growing ever since your first tears
The living memory of all your grief
My roots guided you from hell to life
Lightening your wounds and heart
All prepared for another start
Thankful I bow and go
I walk on... to yet another try
To live, to love, and happiness
Wondering what will bring me down - this time
Wondering what will bring me down - in the end
I walk on... to my life's burial
C'est la vie, qu'on marche enfin...
La marche funèbre
Du berceau, jusqu'à la fin...
La marche funèbre
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