Harakiri For The Sky - III: Trauma
Original Version Vinyl Version 1. Calling the Rain 11:28 1. Calling the Rain 11:28 2. Funeral Dreams 8:59 2. Funeral Dreams 8:59 3. Thanatos 9:21 3. Thanatos 9:21 4. This Life as a Dagger 9:27 4. This Life as a Dagger 9:27 5. The Traces We Leave 8:33 5. The Traces We Leave 8:33 6. Viaticum 8:38 6. Viaticum 8:38 7. Dry the River 9:51 7. Dry the River 9:51 8. Bury Me 8:56 8. Bury Me 8:56 total time 75:13 total time 75:13
1. Calling the Rain Since the day they called me and I heard you passed away I had no peaceful night, no minute of rest I can‘t hear myself think, no love left for another This first night of winter was unison my own death… Come closer dearest void and choke me from the inside Strangle me slowly or break my neck whilst the fall It makes no difference to me, I don’t care at all Neglect the fall as long as we keep on falling apart! You were not my closest friend, but the longest-serving You were my fellow… …or at least you tried. But you died last winter, strung up in the stable They found you in the morning, dead as our dreams… Tonight I’ll get so terribly drunk I’ll lapse into coma For fuck‘s sake! I’ll drink myself into oblivion Cause the only way to forget about you, is to deafen all senses, until deadness eventuates Chance had thrown us together and only death can part If my attempt should not fail, a bullet will all too soon conclude Fuck this life! I re-open my scars and fill the hole in my heart with smack and wine And I will lay down my bones at this stone-cold rivers muddy banks One breath left until the void engulfs me One breath left and all belongs to the past You were not my closest friend, but the longest-serving You were my fellow… …or at least you tried. But you died last winter, strung up in the stable They found you in the morning, dead as our dreams… Tonight I’ll get so terribly drunk I’ll lapse into coma For fuck‘s sake! I’ll drink myself into oblivion Cause the only way to forget about you, is to deafen all senses, until deadness eventuates Fuck this life! Fuck… …my life! This was the year of the great depression this was the year I buried myself in the dust of days! 2. Funeral Dreams The poems I wrote for the last few years Were nothing, but vague prophecies But they abode what they promised So be careful what you wish for, you might get it... Some guys, they just give up living And start dying little by little, piece by piece Some guys bury their hopes beneath disrooted trees But most of them just die a wretched death near these streets... My memories got stolen... ...so hail to the thief Irony causes laughter, but laughter causes pain These mountains, one day, will soak the sea But I won't witness, I won't neither hear nor see... I can already hear the chains clatter behind my ears I can feel the flames searing all last evidence That we have lost this battle doesn't mean we've lost the war But only when we've lost everything, we'll be free to leave... ...we'll be free to leave... We shared the thirst of swans in the summer We shared alignment, the lack long after This city will be the death of me... To be homebound will be the death of me... I can never regret, I can feel sorrow, but at least it's not the same thing I take leave heavy at heart, although it was out of our hands... We shared the thirst of swans in the summer We shared alignment, the lack long after This city will be the death... Will be the death of me 3. Thanatos Childhood ends... ...and all our dear friends leave the town That we were born in and grew up all together Yearling is over, but it's quite hard for me to be cheerfull about it Cause the loss of secureness beggars my confidence by far Within the end of everyday I get more paranoid By the certainty of mortality and death Lunatic, I know, but just because I'm paranoid Doesn't mean they are not after me at all It's beyond me and concerning And just that I know makes me grieve so deeply... ...I don't think we can start all over again... It's a safe bet, cause nothing will ever change... Sometimes things have to fall apart to make way for better ones This happens for sorts of different reasons and most for the wrong Sometimes I'm on the brink to stab my heart Because of this sadness But everything happens for a reason, Whether we like it or not This life dulled me abysmally And crowned me the king of shards Kept sucking me dry Till there was nothing left but a mortal apparel The sons of apathy consigned their souls to escort me They won't see nor find me among their shadows... ...I'M A GHOST NOW... At least this claiming of death means nothing And also life in a sort is just a fallacy I said before, to love, to die All rigged in advance, merciless devastating illusions What you call love or affection is just a figment Someday you'll see, I was so damn right... Distorted reflections, daggers cutting lacerations A lifelong tragedy, scavenging vultures! 4. This Life as a Dagger It took me almost a year to come I thought I'd appear here prior Therefor shorter was the time Until I found the place you sleep Our past caught up with me again This horizon of mountains, as always threatening Rose up behind me, anything but well-disposed Like an all shattering orb Well, that escalated quickly, unsurprisingly Cause as we know now, we were raised by wolves So take care if you fuck with the fast The past at least won't fuck you... Never... ...ever... this melancholy will pass.... I set a foot in our city and I feel so relegated The days we lived here as kids, don't seem too far gone As we hid in these fields together and bolt into the rye I destroyed their childhood memories In getting one thing straight And in doing so, I tried to set their world on fire Now I came for your graveyard For the very first time these days Finally set out for a fleeting visit... ...in the dead of a night... I carried this picture for the last two hundredth and eighty days Just to put it near your last smile, so near, but far beyond Then I did all my tweak and sniffed it off your tombstone Oh believe me brother, I gulped it all in one... I'll never write peace on your wings And let you simmer wordlessly You promised me, that if we leave this place We set free as one But you spoke the words of a coward! Fuck! What have you done?! Now I will smell their scorched earth Until I retire my own worn body... ...or I will finally choke on this city's mephitic air... Never... ...ever... This melancholy will pass... I set a foot in our city and I feel so relegated The days we lived here as kids Don't seem too far gone As we hid in these fields together And bolt into the rye... 5. The Traces We Leave I can't remember why I left my hometown And why I moved to this city, that got me stranded by the tide I wonder who I was those days and who I'm going to be But to secure peace is still the best way to prepare for war This world made me an alcoholic This world makes me wanna die in my sleep This world made me a junkie, dyed-in-the-wool This world made me a razoreater, a homeless fool... No Man is an Island, entire of itself Every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main I am involved in mankind, and so are you Cause we are both part of this vast and moribund clutter And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls Cause it tolls for you and me... ...it tolls for you and me... I didn't believe you, as you once compared love to flames But I guess you were right, cause both leave nothing but ashes For me, love was never tied to conditions In the end I loved you... ...but I chose darkness... I chose darkness... My dear I lost you, as this city lost me We lost our shelter, we even lost the sea Day after day keeps elapsing, some day we'll call it years I'm on my own now... ...but every stranger looks like you... The traces we leave are vague, but they still catch sight Sadly, I'm still lost in this city where I shouldn't be at all It's hard to wake up from a nightmare, when you're not even asleep But this world breaks everyone, and afterwards some are strong at the broken places... 6. Viaticum The depressions got worse... ...and I buried all hope medication will change this fact A life a fevre dream is never worth to be lived A life bound in chains, only worth to be shattered I'll follow these shadows, to become one of them... Save me from staying around like a shadow Save me from straying this maze of void Escort me home mother of dearest demise Cause as a tragedian, I never learned to live! Everything great was built upon sorrow Everything weighty is reasoned on our treasons Not to be free once broke my heart But leaving you to erode me from the inside I wear these wounds like a trophy Cause life's an only bloodline I got born to this world as a stranger As as such... ...I'll leave it all behind... Everything great was built upon sorrow Everything weighty was built upon blood and tears But this has never been my idea of living To find what you love... ...and let it slowly kill you! Time heals nothing! Time is just an appeaser! Time leaves the dust of days Bears me as the outcast son! Sleep well my friend The journey has scarcely started Pace yourself! We will still be walking for miles I know the specters That haunt you in your dreams Cause they already Welcomed me as one of them DEATH TO EVERYONE! DEATH TO EVERYONE! We are a generation lost Born just to find all gods dead All wars fought And all faith in man shaken A generation misunderstood A generation in flames The generation of the disrooted And the damned ...THERE GOES ALL HOPE... 7. Dry the River There was way too much water, but these rivers refused to run dry All worlds wisdom lies buried beneath, but these rivers... ...they refused to run dry There was way too much water, but these rivers refused to run dry All worlds wisdom lies buried beneath, but these rivers... ...they refused to run dry Disabled and unarmed we are adrift on this sea of life A shoreless tide of disorder, just to perish, just to sink We reach the bottom faster than we thin, we run out of breathe Pass the realm of shades and reach their end, which is death... Oh these rivers of nihil, so called rivers of no return Swallowed and will not disgorge me for quite some time They know their courses leading up the happy hunting grounds They know the time of day, know, dead people won't return... I'M HAUNTED BY WATERS Drawn together till the end of days My dear, it will find me, wherever I may roam... I feel enamoured, like moths are attracted to flames I'm the deluge, the greatest flood of all, my own nemesis... ...I AM THE FLOOD... DRY THE RIVER... DRY THE RIVER... DRY... THIS RIVER... You can stop now, leading me up the garden path I'm awoken, I see all people behind their masks All these pale corpses hurrying along a winding path Hurrying down these rivers, to their end, which is death... 8. Bury Me I always dared to know you were entrusted to me, For a few years, as my charge, but not my property I always hoped the dawn of days Wouldn't raze all we edified, I may got dazzled Despite the sun was always hiding from me I hope you'll find what you were always looking for I hope you find the warmth and the protection I was unable to offer For my own part, well I just hope to find myself again To unearth a long-lost part of me Although I disbelief... BURY ME In these starlit, cold waters BURY ME In these much too shallow graves BURY ME Once more, in the dust of days BURY ME Among this river that once flooded this place This dire tide of disorder once again pulled out the sand under my feet Washed me away and got me stranded here, so far away from home They are waiting for me, they are waiting for the world to end Maybe I disguise, but writing this song made me think only of you It won't be long, until I will face the ferryman I'm sure he will be good to me, eventually set me free I'm sure I will find peace now, finally eternal rest For cartage, please withdraw the obolos off my tongue... ...AND LET ME SLEEP... In one case I never had doubts My passing will be a violent one I'll be gone without a warning And all I'll leave: THIS CRYPTIC LETTER This life deadened everything inside me All that I loved was carried away I must have passed the point of no return Felt like a thousand years ago... ...I'm going home now...! I'M GOING HOME NOW Lyrics in plain text format